Sweet treats and bribery

Like all parents I want the best for my kids, I want them to have a healthy diet but I also want them to be able to enjoy treats. I find well timed bribes can work wonders and we are currently attempting potty training with the incentive of a "bedtime cake" for my son if he manages to stay dry for the whole day.

The problem I have with treats is that I am (slightly) fussy about what my children eat. When they're older I'm sure they'll point out my double standards to me - I am not a health nut, I eat chocolate and crisps; at the cinema my favourite pick and mix sweets are the neon green apple cables that are packed full of e-numbers and sugar - however, all that aside I don't give my kids branded chocolate, they never have crisps or icecream in the house and they only get biscuits occasionally - usually when they have friends to play.

My husband would say I'm strict whereas I would say I'm careful. If we are at friend's party or playgroup and everyone else is having sweets then of course our 2 don't get left out. I'm not that mum who insists that her children sit on the side while all the others get cake and icecream, but I do see a massive difference in behaviour when my little darlings are up to their eyeballs in sugar. On the way back from a recent birthday party our 3 year old was manic, he kept trying to reach across to his little sister and consequently wasn't sat safely in his car-seat; cue a massive telling off from daddy and the admission that maybe they do behave a lot worse when they've had too much of sugar.

The compromise I've settled on is that we make a lot of our own treats. Gingerbread biscuits, cupcakes, brownies etc. If I know exactly what has gone into something I am happier to give it as a treat. I do have a few blind spots - the food colourings and sprinkles I add to the icing for instance, but I hold my hand up about this and am not trying to pretend my cakes are completely additive free. A major advantage of making your own treats is being completely in control of portion size. I can cut my brownies into toddler sized pieces, use mini cutters for biscuits and - as I discovered this week - make teeny tiny cupcakes in petit four baking cases.

I am completely in love with these tiny cakes as they are a way of giving my children something that is recognisably a cake without worrying about splitting it between them or being tempted to have a bit myself. I got to play at icing them prettily and my son got to shake the sprinkles over them which he loved. Both my children enjoy baking and I find it a lovely rewarding way to spend time with them. I find I can cope with mess much better if I end up with something tasty as a result, than if the only outcome is salt dough squashed into the carpet. Fingers crossed they continue to enjoy baking and cooking as they grow up...

Hearts for my valentine

Love it or hate it, last week it was difficult to avoid Valentines day.

Whether you decided to go for broke with dinner, champagne and roses or to ignore it completely because you resent the commercialism, you must have been hard pressed to miss the oceans of roses as you walked through the supermarket doors, and the conveniently placed cards by the tills.

This year my husband and I opted for something in the middle. With 2 children and a 5 year anniversary next month, the days of exclusive restaurants and pre-dinner champagne have gone by the wayside, replaced with a candle lit "dine in meal for 2" and a bottle of Asti.

The key thing for me when we decided to stay at home was that we should still have a romantic evening that felt different to a normal night in. This meant candles, music and something a bit special. The candles and music were easily sorted - heart shaped tealights spotted while doing the weekly shop and the Love Actually CD that was still on the side from last year when we did something similar. The final touch came in the form of home-made cupcakes with heart chocolates, inspired by a random picture on Facebook and the novel Chocolat by Joanne Harris.

The thought of making my own chocolate hearts appealed to me. Reading a book filled with descriptions of tempering and making chocolates somewhere in the french countryside fills you with romantic ideas of creating mountains of delicious truffles in the blink of an eye. Having said that the reality of 1st time chocolates would probably be less successful, so I decided to compromise on cupcakes which I know I can make well, combined with the easiest type of chocolates I had found to make.

Over the last few years I have taught myself - quite successfully, the art of cake decorating; from swirly butter cream cupcakes to Christmas cakes and Thomas the tank engine cakes, I've spent a decent amount of time and "fun money" on a hobby that pays dividends at birthdays and special occasions. The cupcakes are easy, combine Nigella Lawson's fairy cake recipe with Hummingbird Bakery vanilla butter cream and you have calorific cupcakes to die for. The tricky bit was the chocolates which I had never tried before. I opted for Wilton Candy Melts, not real chocolate but a candy available in different colours that can be moulded. A tray of heart shapes and red candy was all I needed to get started and within an hour I had some presentable red hearts to go on top of my cupcakes. Ok so they had a few air bubbles in them and I cracked the mould a bit getting them out but overall I was pretty pleased with the results. With a bit of practice I think I could start regularly adding little moulded candies to my cakes and maybe even have a decent go at making real chocolates in the future.